When Woman Leads into Eroticism

Michal Gondek

Co-Created by Lucie Bečková,  Illustrated by Dagmar Angelína Merhautová

When woman leads into eroticism

Michal Gondek

Co-Created by Lucie Bečková

Illustrated by Dagmar Angelína Merhautová

Copyright © 2024 Michal Gondek

All rights reserved.  No part of this book may be reproduced,  stored or distributed in any way - electronically,  mechanically,  graphically,  or digitally.  Harmonious mentions of the book or quotation use is permitted with credits.  Sharing of ideas or specific techniques mentioned on a larger scale is only possible with the written permission of the author.

text © Michal Gondek,  2023
illustrations © Dagmar Angelína Merhautová,  2023
preface © Lucie Bečková,  2023
poems © Michal Gondek,  Lucie Bečková,  Lucie Tkočová, 2023
translation © Lucie Bečková,  2024
original Czech title: KDYŽ DO EROTIKY VEDE ŽENA
copyright for English edition © Michal Gondek,  2024

ISBN 978-80-11-05673-5 (pdf)
ISBN 978-80-11-05674-2 (ePub)
ISBN 978-80-11-05675-9 (Mobipocket)

I dedicate this book to all who sense,  feel,  know that erotic play and intimate relationships have much more potential to create bliss than is normally seen or experienced.  I dedicate it to you who want to kindly penetrate,  not only in amorous interactions,  deeper and deeper…

Let's Make More Love

This book explains some universal and timeless principles when it comes to love relationships and eroticism. Nevertheless, it shows primarily our personal view, which may not be unreservedly correct, complete or inclusive of all life circumstances. We share what we see and have experienced in depth.

Although some of the formulations may sound suggestive, we don't mean them dogmatically and you should not just accept them uncritically. The individual ideas are presented as inspirations to be examined and tested by your own wisdom and, above all, by your own experience.

You may find some parts of the text, comparisons or jokes rude or rather delicate. Author prefers to be accurate rather than socially correct. And although we wish to caress all our readers with words, we desire even more to transform them, so they can caress themselves much more passionately in life. We are shining light on places that you may have been hiding in the dark for a long time. We push uncompromisingly in spots, which may hurt you. But pain is not the purpose, it is a reference point. Once released, your ecstasy will flow much more freely.

With the whole team we took great care in formulating the ideas and principles shared and including all the necessary context. However, we are not liable for any mistakes, omissions or consequences that may be (un)achieved by their application. In case of any difficulties or complications, we recommend seeking the help of a psychotherapist or other qualified guide. Mentoring is also possible straight with us. Find more information at www.toopenup.com.

Acknowledgements

​If I were to express all my gratitude to all for the life and love lessons I have experienced with them it would be for a book of its own. But that would probably be of interest "only" to me and to God. There are three women, however, I wish to express my tribute, respect and gratitude for their inspirations to. For this small book in terms of size, but a masterpiece in the potential for life transformation, is co-created by their insights, energy, support and their experiences and abilities.

Images that speaks this book through,

crafted by Angelina, Art Goddess for sure,

by archetypes inspired, touched by the divine,

having them here - what an honor of mine!

To attentive reader, initiations are these,

into souls deeply speak her images,

even more than words shared precisely by me

or perhaps they complement each other perfectly…

Deep connection that among us was and is,

way this enriches others and lives,

as our souls once wished,

may the world benefit from what we have lived...

✽✽✽

Gratitude mine also goes to Luci, my muse,

heart of the book, who brings all the juice,

turning my thoughts into a tender kiss,

checking every sentence, so it perfectly fits.

Accuracy and precision don't suffice,

her editorial work, such patient turbo cat's advice,

may it sound beautiful, please the eye, lovingly she push,

her sense for beauty and detail shines, even when hushed.

With countless details, she sets the scene right,

for the book to be born and to live in the light,

yet beyond what perceived with her eye,

she inspired me most to be a better guy.

Doing it together was joy and honor for me,

the theme fits, neither of us an ascetic be,

juicy, joyful, deep our collaboration spree,

for masculinity and femininity dance, we're the melody.

✽✽✽

Another muse deserves thanks in this tale,

Lucie Tkočová, whose magic does prevail,

even in erotic energy and love(r)'s affairs,

letting her speak what felt from divine's airs.

To her crystal-clear heart, nothing escapes,

that isn't transparently innocent, in all its shapes.

Her home lies where dual dramas cease to be,

in divine unity of no more you and me.

From her tower, with lightness and love's energy rare,

she conjures ecstasies with a palette beyond compare.

Many of her abilities inspired this book's direction,

guiding passionate lovemaking with immense affection.

Intimacy as sacred responsible game, awakening to the divine,

she teaches with her being to love(make) even more fine.

At the root, she cuts illusions and dependencies,

adding to the fire of ecstatic transcendences.

Praise for the book

(translated from their original)

A funny, witty and titillating read and above all an excellent guide for both men and women to deepen their mutual love and eroticism together. It is a necessary and very important piece in the puzzle of mutual understanding. This book will show you how simply we work and that with just a few minor adjustments, relationships can work great. The most interesting book on relationships I've read in years!

Lucie Kolaříková | Psychologist, Specialist in Selflove Realm

✽✽✽

The book is once again a very controversial piece and it evokes a lot of competing feelings. It irritates me, yet at the same time I have to nod very loudly at some of the insights that seem to have fallen right out of my soul. I sense that this approach is not black and white and not for everyone. However, if women and men accepted this conception of love life as their own, i.e., that a woman leads into eroticism, a lot of hardship and frustration would fall away and thus probably a lot of unnecessary breakups and burnout of intimacy. There is a great need to bring new perspectives on sexuality, and that is where this book is unique.

Jana Mašková Zimolová, CSB | Lecturer of Female Sexuality

✽✽✽

This book is pragmatic, practical, romantic, poetic, profound and simple. I enjoy its playfulness, interesting structure, humor, precise theory and its deep poetry, based on experiences into which the text leads. The book is as colorful as life itself and carries a huge therapeutic overlay. Throughout we're given the opportunity to confront the fact that eroticism can and should work differently. That it can lead to unconditional happiness and not just to the fulfillment of some kind of partner duty.

Lucie Tkočová | Creatress of personal paintings, Mom

✽✽✽

Michal's new gem "When a Woman Leads into Eroticism" is a slim but poignant book. Apart from tantric principles, it practically presents why is it good to (“mis”)lead men sometimes. It will help you to understand your body and yourself a little better.

Veronika Wildová | Singer and Soul Guide

✽✽✽

The book is a novel excursion into the underworld of partner dynamics. From the very first lines, it draws you in so much that you can't help but nod and smile in approval at the sensual moments and thoughts vividly portrayed. Most of all, I appreciate breaking down taboos and common misconception that sex should exclusively start and lead one gender or the other. Enrichment of witty interludes I see as a favorable icing on this big sexy piece of cake.

Michaela Aira Fibichrová | CEO Tantraela s.r.o., Womb Hacker

✽✽✽

This book is not only about eroticism. It has a great deal of overlap into partner relationships, which are one of the important pillars of mental health. The author explains straightforwardly how men and women function and what they need on the level of emotions or eroticism. Understanding the principles described, and especially putting them into practice, can be healing for many couples. The book is also a guide on how not to make assumptions and thus widen the gap in (mis)communication.

Petra Chvátalová | Holistic Psychiatrist

✽✽✽

Sensitively and clearly presented principle of male-female dynamics in erotic dance. This book is a refreshing invitation to a higher level of intimacy and ecstasy in everyday interactions, and “just” reading it opens the heart. It is a great complement and follow-up to the author's first book, "Open Relationships: What If You Fall in Love with More Than Just One?"

Petr Valenta | Entrepreneur, Financial Expert, Passionate Explorer of Erotica

✽✽✽

In our practice, we often discuss relationship conflicts that arise from misunderstanding partner polarity. We marvel at the many perspectives the author takes on intimate partner relationships and how closely he deals with the principles of attraction between men and women. He brings unique information that can be the key to many couples' fulfillment in the sexual realm and thus in their entire lives. Respecting principles described in this book leads to a deeper understanding of oneself and others so that one can form truly conscious relationships.

Václav Thor and Markéta Zika Koppová | Guides in the World of Sexuality and Conscious Touch

✽✽✽

This book made me want to be more mindful in my love connections, to be inspired by the woman, to adore her, to watch her gradually evolve and be attentive to her and the energy that flows through her. I realized that it's more interesting and pleasurable not to “manufacture” ecstatic experiences, but to be, through the woman, in connection with the erotic energy itself. The vices that had limited me in eroticism, despite my rich experience, disappeared. I have experienced many aha moments and my erotic life has improved and become more fluid many times over. Moreover, much of the book can be applied outside of erotica. Thanks for this inspiration!

Marek Cinko | Artistic Sculptor

✽✽✽

A book that makes you exclaim, "Wow, how apt!" And to the inner question, "But how to do it differently?!" the answer is offered immediately. For those who are ready to burst a few imaginary relationship bubbles and delve into the mysteries of male-female dynamics, reading will definitely be an exciting adventure! Prepare for an engaging journey laced with humor and a deep dive that will make you think about partner intimacy and bring understanding to places that have been shrouded in mystery.

Michaela Špaček | Marketer, Cocoa Ceremony Guide

✽✽✽

1. Editor's Foreword

Olomouc, December 2, 2023

What a ride! Gorgeous, transformative, juicy, fun. Infused with exquisite energies and higher consciousness, blessed with God's grace. Creating another book together. So divine and yet so "ordinary". Like the main idea of the book itself.

The importance that eroticism should be led (much more and much more often) by a woman has been laid on my heart many times by Michal. We have spent an abundance of mutually enriching time together on this subject. Everything suddenly made so much sense! But why doesn't anyone know about it, and where is some book shedding light on this reality? So I winked at him playfully until he accepted my inspiration to bring this wisdom to the world.

It was originally intended to be a playful 20-page online manual. However, along with humor, lightness and juiciness, our handwriting has also proven to be profound, precise and thorough, embracing the topic from all sides. So now you can embrace the idea in its full richness. An idea so new, unconventional and perhaps even controversial to many. A wisdom, however, simple and natural to us. When woman leads into eroticism.

In reality, it's not "only" into erotica and "only" a woman at all. I recommend perceiving the text much more as a description of a really broad and in many nuances materializing attitude towards life. In this work we place it in the context of amorous interactions between men and women. However, underlying the book and the work itself was and is the archetypal play of masculinity and femininity, the play of consciousness and energy. These dance together in the universe, and in your life no less, in countless forms.

Whether you are a woman or a man, whether you have a predominance of feminine or masculine energy. Maybe you're eighteen and have no experience with eroticism. Or maybe you've been teaching conscious sexuality for a couple of decades. The book is diverse. It has the potential to inspire, open and enrich you. But it can also upset or even aggravate you. Especially if it touches something fragile or unfamiliar in you. And who knows... maybe it'll "just" remind you of the wisdom you already have within.

Keep in mind that we don't bring one single truth. "This is the way it is, always and for everyone, and that's it." We shed a light into the depths of refined erotic intimacy. Let the treasures you may discover elevate and transform (not only) your erotic experience in a beneficial way.

In my opinion, you need at least a taste of the state this book introduces you to. A reality in which you express yourself erotically in a completely free and responsible way. You know where to reach, when to fully spread your wings, or what and why (not) to give. You study and discover relationships and eroticism with pleasure and master their role with ease. Intimate encounters nourish you, inspire you, fulfill you. You feel safety, deep meaning, playfulness, respect, admiration, and God's grace in them, and increasingly in all of your life. Male-female interactions serve you as nourishing entertainment and a self-development gym at the same time. You accept them as constant feedback from life, as a reference point for your personal and spiritual growth.

You can do everything and you don't have to do anything. You perceive and fulfill your inner needs and desires. If you can, you support others harmoniously as well. You expand your capacity for pleasure and love. You allow yourself to shout "yes!" when you want something. You say "no" with courage and loving consistency when you perceive it to be the right and beneficial thing to do in a given context. You are giving the best to and of yourself. You're not trying to please anyone or to get love or attention. You are giving, with gratitude and humbleness as a way to fully experience your power, beauty and the exquisiteness and sacredness of (your) erotic energy.

You may be thinking, "This is what this little book is supposed to bring to me?!" In the past, I myself had no idea how significantly my (not only love) life would be shaken by "one single thought." How much the principles described further would enrich, open and enlighten me.

My transformation was as juicy and empowering as it was challenging and testing my determination. I resisted this new approach quite intensely for a few months! To my surprise, I also had to understand, heal and let go of some major wounds, fears and automatic behaviors in the area of relationships and intimacy. Either the ones I had chosen as lessons for myself in this or past lives, or the ones that were acting on me from the collective (sub)consciousness. Through careful practice, however, I had so mastered the guidance into the erotic that I had almost forgotten that it had ever been otherwise...

This new magical world nourishes, entertains, empowers me. I am able to ask for what I want and need in intimacy, eroticism and in my whole life. Sometimes gently, sometimes firmly. But no longer with shame or guilt. I am not afraid to be a gentle, delicate and cuddly kitty. But I can also be a determined, passionate lioness. What's more, I'm getting better and better at drawing my loved ones into my bliss states in such a way that refreshes and brings us closer.

I wish you all the experiences of love and flow that leading by a woman brings! As well as the ever deepening partner intimacy, the growing ecstasy, the expanding consciousness. The necessary context, knowledge and practical skills will be revealed to you in the reading itself. To mix up a truly delicious cocktail, add a dash of mischief, a handful of openness, and a glass filled to the edge with courage. Don't forget a good dose of practice and a sincere intention, which is also our wish for you... let's make more love ♡

May humor create relaxation,

poetry make your heart wide open,

pictures stimulate wild imagination

and key sentences allow a theme digestion.

Let words brighten your mind and bed,

Tantric wisdom show what lies ahead,

radical honesty trust may bring,

tips you'd love practicing.

Revisiting my past - wake up call,

wouldn't go back to passivity at all!

That (whatever and however) much am I, fears have dissolved,

I wish you much courage now to explore.

Sensing from man's heart still learning

book this that helped, worth mentioning.

May it enrichment to you as well bring,

to contribute that I could - God's blessing.

Lucie Bečková

2. Author's Foreword

I greet you, dear reader, and I greet you even more, dear “readeress”,

you get your hands on a short but dense file that, if used correctly, can make an erotic revolution, at least for you and your bedroom. Together, we'll explore one of the “traditional” rules of erotic play. This, though mostly unspoken, is that in matters of love, men are and should be more proactive than women. In the next pages you'll see how this rule affects you in love games and what spice can it bring if you dare to playfully change it.

Maybe you feel deep down that amorous games hold much greater promise than what you're currently experiencing in your bedroom while making love. There are many ways to deepen your love fulfillment. If you're interested in erotic themes, surely many have come to your attention already. There's plenty of books and seminars on eroticism. But what I'm about to describe here, I haven't encountered clearly articulated yet, although I don't consider myself uneducated in this area.

Maybe you, as a woman, feel that the flower of your erotic life is not blooming to its fullest. Maybe you're a man, who feels that the gift of his sexuality is not fully accepted by beloved partner. Know that the following advice itself may be an entry into another erotic dimension. The well-established unspoken rule that men should be more active in eroticism may play a large role in your life as well. Maybe it never occurred to you to question whether it's right. Maybe it hasn't occurred to you to explore or test what different results will bring if you follow different rules in erotic play. So see with me what it can bring when you and your love partner change this seemingly natural rule. You may be saying to yourself now: "But we don't play by any rules of love games, we don't bind ourselves by any concept, we leave it up to the spontaneity of the situation who, when and how we express ourselves erotically." Or maybe in your head you're thinking: "We are the ones who regularly take turns in the erotic initiative, who would stick to outdated gender stereotypes..." or maybe you're convinced that your lovemaking is perfect without my bullshit advice. Even in those cases, I can almost promise you that the perspective I offer here will enrich your eroticism, if you keep an open mind.