Naked

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Natálie Hájková

Naked – e-kniha

Copyright © Albatros Media a. s., 2024

Všechna práva vyhrazena.

Žádná část této publikace nesmí být rozšiřována

bez písemného souhlasu majitelů práv.

Věnováno tobě, drahý čtenáři. Tobě, kdo držíš tuto knihu v rukou. Díky tobě tu NAKED může být.

Reflection

She’s pale,

an unhealthy colour.

White as a snowdrop,

if not for the dark circles

laying beneath her dull green eyes.

Stare blank

as if she wasn’t there,

as if she never slept.

as if she was almost dead

I don’t recognize her anymore,

She looks like a walking corpse,

Lurking in the shadows,

Ever to be seen or heard.

She looks like me

-no she doesn’t

this isn’t healthy

- for beauty you suffer

This doesn’t feel right

-trust me, it’s better

I’m not worth it

- You’re starting to get it.

My reflection blurs a little,

tears in my eyes spill down my chin,

As I look up from the mirror

The voice in my head is with me still.

-AZ

Little girl, hiding under the bed,

writing in her diary, everything he said.

How he called her good,

no wonder she thought of him,

as a lover would think about their dear.

She had troubles, she knew it well,

but there was nothing she could do,

to avoid all those feelings, she had for him.

A role model, a dad she didn’t have.

Parents must think that she just hit puberty.

They wouldn’t even consider,

that she’s spending time like this.

Thinking about him in all the ways possible,

ways she didn’t understand,

ways she would learn.

The things he had shown her,

that she hadn’t see before.

That she feared.

If he only knew,

what he had done

Dried up roses

Hanging dead flowers. They smell funny. They smell strongly of sweet decomposition. They are pretty, but dead. Usually nothing dead is pretty, but flowers? Hanging upside down, slowly dying.

You wouldn’t look pretty, hanging upside down, slowly dying. No, you wouldn’t.

Is there a point to keep on trying?

Is it worth to keep on surviving,

or is it useless to live without sense?

Numb and broken,

as though my spirit has been stolen.

Why does my conscience destroy itself

on daily basis,

like once a carefree dove,

now wasting away in its self-built cage,

longing for even a taste of belonging.

A single rose in thousand miles of deserted land.

Barely surviving off the little pond at hand

Is there a point to keep on trying?

Is it worth to keep on surviving,

or is it useless to live without sense?

Numb and broken,

as though my spirit has been stolen.

Why does my conscience destroy itself

on daily basis,

like once a carefree dove,

now wasting away in its self-built cage,

longing for even a taste of belonging.

A single rose in thousand miles of deserted land.

Barely surviving off the little pond at hand.

Nepoučitelná

Začalo to nevinně, skončilo to špatně,

utekl jsi ode mě, já jsem z toho na dně.

Všechny chvilky s tebou? dokola si přehrávám,

prosím buď tu se mnou, bez tebe to nezvládám.

Všechno, cos mi říkal, se zapomenout nedá,

to jak ses mě dotýkal, furt v myšlenkách běhá.

V myšlenkách mám jenom nás, co by mohlo být,

co se stane možná zas, co budu navždy chtít.

Chci to všechno zpátky, nemůžu se dostat dál,

to vyznání tvý lásky, jak ses na mě usmíval.

Když tě vidim šťastnýho, když tě cítím u sebe,

nechci už nic jinýho a vnímam čistě jen tebe.

Holding back my tears,

no, I cannot stand to cry.

Called out to speak,

though I can’t get a word out.

The lump in my throat

feels like I swallowed dry sand.

The pearl of happiness

absent from my heart.

Nowhere seen,

nowhere to be found.

A glass animal

Is she perfect?

She’s divine.

Does he struggle?

He displays a smile.

Is it happiness,

Or pride,

When a person seems to be feeling fine?

But perhaps,

That’s not the truth;

Even

If their heart is full of love.

But who keeps it like such,

When in public they’re appealing,

And let it out when no one’s listening?

And sometimes not even that.

It’s just silent words

That are coming out of their throat;

That’s what it’s like to be trapped,

In the cage of yourself

That you’ve been trying to open up,

Yet,

So far,

That’s the main reason of you being unsuccessful.

The storms and volcanos come to rise.